3:51 AM

I love being cold.
I adore breathing in the stimulating midnight air.
To feel my comforter tangled with my sheets and my limbs.
Although, it is not comforting yet as it is just as cold as the air surrounding us,
Once my body shares some of its warmth
The comfort will paralyze me for as long as I wish.

My body longs for November.

Revel in the songs of the cicadas.
They will lull you into slumber deeper than any fairytale.

yearning

-noun
1. deep longing especially when accompanied by tenderness or sadness.
2. an instance of such longing.

-synonyms
1. see desire

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1:41 AM

My tired, mascara smeared eyes
Underneath my lazily disheveled mass of hair that sits on top of my head like a bowler hat.
Like a certain Mr. Fudge once wore. My mind is weary and sporadic.
Empty headphones rest in my ears with traces of such "folk" and "indie pop" still ringing.
Genres awkwardly assigned.
My sheets are a mess as I have not been able to get comfortable for days.
Clumsy thoughts ache through me.
Irrational attraction overpowers my better judgement. Consumes my rationality.
The hunger for reciprocated thoughts gnaws at my insecurities.

I'm dramatic.

Wilt

Someday the sun will shine through the moss covered cracks and expose the intricate creatures that try to stay hidden below.


The rays are too strong for your garden,
The heat too much for your flower beds.

Drilled

Don't teach me how to be right.
tolerable.
proper.
righteous.
just.
impeccable.
convenient.
established.


Teach me how to be happy.

Retrospect

I remember the time you left when you could have spent time with us.
I remember the time he got yelled at for his opinions.
I remember the time you hated my friends because they weren't like you.
I remember the time you admitted your mistakes. Your regrets.
I remember the time I discovered your lies.
I remember the time I was too afraid of punishment to voice how I felt.
I remember the time I grew up before I should have needed to.
I remember the time I wanted to stick my fingers down my throat because you told me I ate too much.
I remember the time I prayed the sadness would be gone.
I remember the times I was disappointed.
I remember the time you told me my mother was a liar.
I remember the time he hugged me for the first time in years.
I remember the time I first felt hatred.
I remember the time you lied and said you were proud of me because that's what everyone expected of you.
I remember the time you made me doubt God.
I remember the time I wanted to be free.
I remember the time I no longer looked up to you.

I remember the time I decided to let go.

Encumbrance

We're eternally trapped.
Forever in this rut of
Confusion.
A steel chain on our hearts
But more so on our bodies.

Muzzled in pain,
We refuse to voice our concern.
Too often our own words
Conspire against us,
Leaving us even more speechless than before.

Tongue-tied,
Our minds leave our bodies
Wishing for another vantage point.
Ostracizing our thoughts.
Banishing them to a remote warehouse
Where to stumble upon them
Would be impractical.

Our journey together
Is a futile pursuit.

We may as well turn back now.

Wilderness

Lives.
Tangled together.
Each branch intertwines with another's.
Vines climb our limbs
Spreading affection, disapproval,
Companionship and bitterness.

Some leaves graze our throats,
Threatening to do damage.
Others interlace with our fingers
Withdrawing all worries from our mind.
The trees grow through and around us
Pushing our spirits along with them.
Further into the thicket
Our lives delve.

Each hedge is blooming with wild berries.
The deeper through the branches we go,
The more precious and sweet the juice.
Share your rations with one another.
Indulge.